How Social Media Platforms Don’t Owe You A Thing

You don’t own social media.

Social media owns you. Each time you use their product, they can take your data to sell to their advertisers. They can sell and give access to your data to marketers like me to understand what makes you tick.

All this information relies on one main thing: it gives us (the brands) the chance to know how you react. I can create a customer profile based on your likes, dislikes, and how you view content.

Control what you consume

As the new year is here, I hope you have written down every goal you have in place. To understand these goals, I need you to know what content you consume. From how you engage online, it builds a world around you on how the algorithm gives you access to a select range.

Do you realize that the algorithm is tailored to what YOU like online? If you keep engaging in low-value content, you will keep seeing it because the algorithm is seeing what you frequent the most.

You are the product of these social media networks. If you find yourself scrolling on Instagram and looking into the comments of media platforms like the Shade Room, your following may be why you are not reaching your goals. You are not placing yourself in those environments, even online.

Mark’s Club in London, UK – one of the exclusive private member’s clubs in the wealthiest parts of London, Mayfair.

Build your mindset

You need to have a strategic goal in mind regarding how your present yourself on social media publicly. This is even for the women who have private accounts and let certain people into their circle. As I say, every person in this world has a personal brand. It may not be in a business sense, but you are known for something in your life.

Let’s say you want to be a woman of luxury. I want you to begin to use social media as a tool.


  1. Do you follow luxury brands (i.e. Chanel, Dior, Baccarat)?
  2. Do you follow influencers that only focus on luxury content? (Beauty, Fashion, Cars, Art, Interior Design)
  3. Do you follow key private social groups? (I will get into an article about this later.)
  4. Do you follow media outlets on both ends of the political spectrum and from different countries? (Diverse thought is a crucial understanding in changing your mindset.)
  5. Do you follow critical investments like art and real estate? (ie. Sotheby’s, Christie’s)

This is a starting point to tailor your world around what you see on social media. You should use social media as a tool of discovery. As we are gaining so much information, social media is an essential part of everyone’s lives because of its access to new opportunities.

FAD — Model, and Socialite. Key Branding Examples with Designer Jewelry and Watches. Location of Exclusivity of St. Barths, London, Dubai restaurants. Recently returned to social media after a 6-month break.

Take It Offline

Now that you understand that social media is not only a game…

It’s a lifestyle change and accessibility to new social capital.

Social capital is “the networks of relationships among people who live and work in a particular society, enabling that society to function effectively“. – Wikipedia

I have connected with many people via Instagram and Twitter. I use social media to find a coach, connect with key social groups, develop a list of key restaurants, and brand founders to interview, and create a group of amazing women to elevate with. All of this is because of my strategy behind social media and how I approach it.

Remember that social media is a tool, not something to live through. As I stated in my previous post, you are not a celebrity. You want to build a life outside of social media.

This is the information age, where you have access to social media, Youtube, and places to purchase silent mentors, aka books, to elevate yourself.


Please go through my personal Instagram (@thesterlingstudy) to see how I strategically showcase myself. Please go through the feed posts, look through the stories, and go through who I follow.

Now, I want you to choose three people that you admire. It does not have to be celebrities or influencers. I would suggest looking into your key luxury magazines (like Atlantan Magazine) in your city to find the socialities in your town. For example, one of the Atlanta socialities.

  1. What does their feed look like? Does it give an excellent first impression?
  2. What are they doing in their stories? Do they go to places that you are interested in?
  3. Are they tagging the places, and can you see what the tagged Instagram looks like? If they tagged the location on their feed, can you know what type of people goes there?
  4. Who are they following? Is it valuable for you to go to those places?

I use these questions to build my strategy to get into certain rooms with people I want to meet. It is how I chose my new nail salon because many of the women that have a membership of this private country club I want to get access to get their nails done there.

Of course, we will be diving more into social media’s branding and strategy aspects. Do not forget to do these exercises and get REAL with yourself about where you want to be.